Randomness Galore: An Interview With Me

I know, I know, I have a rather lengthy About Me section that pretty adequately introduces myself. (Bonus points if you’ve actually read it! 😉 ) But last week I was tagged by Andrew Toynbee in one of those informational interview games that shows you the person behind the blog. Some of you may remember my stance on participating in chain letter-esque things from the last time I was tagged in one. But like that previous post, I feel this one has some merit. And since I’m not one to scoff at the gracious gift of being tagged, I’m going to participate. I can get back to whining about my lack of progress on Unmoving next week.

The Rules:

 

  1. Post these rules. (Are we really not smart enough to figure these out from the post?)
  2. Post a photo of yourself. (Seriously? Ugh, guess I better go dredge something out of the archives where I don’t have 3 extra chins and look like I’m completely high.)
  3. Post eleven random facts about yourself. (Hmmm, this could get interesting.)
  4. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger’s post. (Thank you, Captain Obvious. Isn’t that the whole point of participating?)
  5. Create 11 new questions and tag some people to answer them. Make sure to go to their blog, twitter, etc. and let them know they’ve been tagged. (10-4. Time to come up with some really embarrassing informative questions and some willing victims participants! ;))

(I took a few liberties with the order of the rules to allow for snarky side comments. But you’ll forgive me, right? Everyone loves some sarcasm with their instructions, don’t they?)

The Photo:

 
This one seemed appropriately mischievous, and I only have two chins, so that’s a plus:

Mischief

Looks like I’m about to send that poor guy (aka my husband) barreling down the side of the cliff on a spooked horse, doesn’t it? I would never do that, of course. Especially since this was taken on our honeymoon and I still rather liked him at that point. (Just kidding, I still love you, babe!) But yeah, that’s me, looking all evil and stuff. On to the next part of the game!

11 Random Factoids:

 

  1. I’m a vegetarian who hates all things vegetable. How’s that for a difficult diet?
  2. My first concert was The Backstreet Boys. (Yep, that’s not embarrassing in the least.)
  3. I have a weird obsession with all things office supply.
  4. I hate having stuff on my feet, but absolutely love shoes.
  5. I’m a shopaholic. When I’m not broke as a joke, that is.
  6. I think chocolate should be its own food group. Which explains why photos of me with 3 chins exist.
  7. It drives me nuts to get stuff on my hands. Dirt, charcoal, chalk, stickiness, whatever. I don’t like it!
  8. I still listen to The Backstreet Boys. (That’s even more embarrassing!)
  9. I don’t think I’m funny. It amazes me when people laugh at something I meant as truth.
  10. I think in pictures. Seriously. Like animated pictures. (Who wins the freak award of the day? This girl!)
  11. I loathe pink but look amazing in it, so half my closet is pink.

Andrew’s Questions for Me:

 
1. What was the last book that you read?

Oh jeez, I’m all about embarrassing myself today! The last book I read was…wait for it…50 Shades of Grey by E.L. James. Yep, that’s right. I read it. In its entirety. I think any time a book rockets to that level of stardom it’s worth reading, if only so you can catch all the references to it that surround you for the next 6 months. But in all honesty, I kind of liked it.

2. If you could retire within the next five years, to where would you like to retire?

This is an easy one. Hawaii! Or pretty much anywhere that’s warm and near the ocean. I don’t care for the rain and have an extreme dislike for snow. So naturally, I moved to the rainy capital of the pacific northwest. Makes perfect sense, right? No one said I was the brightest crayon in the box.

3. What genre are you writing – and have you attempted any other genres in the past?

Currently, I’m writing Urban/Contemporary Fantasy. But the bulk of my work is actually in Dark Fantasy. I suppose, if you want to get technical about it, they’re both the same genre– Fantasy. I have yet to step outside that realm, but I do have a few plans for branching into Sci-Fi. Other than that, I’m pretty set in my ways. For now. Who knows, I might randomly decide to tackle Mystery, or Literary, or Hamster Romance. ( No? That’s not a thing?) That’s the beauty of creativity– you can do whatever you can imagine. 🙂

4. Fruit or chocolate?

Chocolate. Duh! See Random Factoid #6, where I declare that chocolate should constitute it’s own food group. (Seriously, who do we have to convince to make that happen?)

5. What stage is your current WIP at?

Right now, it’s languishing on the corner of part-way-done and never-getting-finished. In all seriousness though, I’d say it’s roughly a third of the way complete.

6. What colour is your hair – and your eyes?

My hair is medium brown with grey highlights, thanks to my inherited curse of premature grey. I’m still hoping for an awesome skunk stripe, but so far, it’s not that localized. 😦

According to my driver’s license, my eyes are hazel. But they’re more toward the green end of that spectrum. With the right clothing and make-up, I can actually push them into green, which is awesome. I love green eyes.

7. Agent or self-publish?  And why?

Both. I’ve spoken quite a bit about my reasons, so if anyone is curious, I suggest browsing the archives for the full disclosure. Basically, it came down to branding. Since my Urban Fantasy series is the anomaly among my work, I’m choosing to self-publish those, while seeking to place everything else with a traditional publisher. I find the freedom and challenge of self-publishing appealing, but there’s still part of me that can’t let go of seeing my work on the shelves of Barnes & Noble someday. Although, if they close too, I suppose I won’t have to worry about that dream anymore.

8. What was the last movie you went to see?  With friends or alone?

The last movie I saw was Oz,  The Great and Powerful. I saw it with my husband. I’m not brave enough to see movies alone, so he gets dragged to a lot of films I’m sure he’d be alright passing on. But I do have to say, Oz had some of the best 3D I’ve ever seen. The stunning visuals were well worth the price of the tickets.

9. How long have you been with WordPress – and what was your first post about?

I’m actually coming up on my 1 year anniversary, on May 4. I signed up a few months before that, but waited to start posting articles until I had finished setting up the rest of the site. Well, most of it, anyway. I still have to finish some of the things I had planned, like the Art Gallery. But I’ll get to them eventually. I hope.

My first post was basically my thesis statement, explaining why I was starting this blog and what I intended to write about. For the most part, I think I’ve held pretty true to that thesis. Although that first post is probably the shortest one I’ve ever written that wasn’t an announcement of some kind.

10. What can you see beyond your screen?  If it’s a wall, what’s immediately behind you?

Aw, my blank white wall isn’t good enough for you? Let’s see…*turns around*

Behind me is a window, looking out on one rather large tree in the middle of the lawn. Beyond that is the road, and across that is some kind of weird church thing. I think I need better surroundings. That was almost as exciting as the wall.

11. Do you type head-down or head-up?

If by head-up you mean looking at the screen instead of my fingers, then yes, head-up. I’m a secretary by day and a writer by night. So I pretty much type all the time. Carpal Tunnel Syndrome is most definitely in my future. Yay for impending surgery!

~

 
That’s it for me. Which means I now get to spread the joy. Since a lot of the lovely people I would have tagged have already had the pleasure of being grabbed by someone else, I’m once again going to be a rule-breaker. Instead of tagging any one blogger in particular, I’m tagging all of you– my readers. (Boo-yah! Bet you didn’t see that coming!) I know a lot of you have blogs of your own, so feel free to continue the posting fun. As an alternative, or if you don’t have a blog, you can also answer the following 11 questions in the comments below. I think it will be just as much fun for me to get to know all of you as it is to learn more about my favorite bloggers. So I hope at least some of you will participate. You can’t possibly embarrass yourself more than I have; what have you got to lose?

My 11 Questions to You:

 
1. Where are you from?

2. If you’re a writer, what genres do you write? If you’re not a writer, what’s your favorite genre to read?

3. What’s your dream job and are you lucky enough to have it?

4. Name someone who inspired you and tell us why/how.

5. What’s something you’ve always wanted to do, but haven’t?

6. What’s your favorite animal? (Real or Fictitious)

7. If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go?

8. You’re getting shipped to the proverbial deserted island and can only bring 3 things. What are they?

9. List your top five all-time favorite songs, including the artist.

10. Where is your happy place?

11. What’s your favorite girl’s name? Boy’s?

Sarcasm; It’s Not for Everyone

By now I’m sure you’ve gleaned that sarcasm and I are BFF’s. And if you haven’t, let me spell it out for you; sarcasm and I are BFF’s. There, don’t you feel enlightened? 😉

But while I’m a huge fan of the cleverly timed sarcastic quip, not everyone is. Some people fail to see the humor in wittily worded insults and beautifully snide observations. (There must be something wrong with them. Who doesn’t love some clever, snarky banter?) Just like I fail to see the humor in Slap-Stick, Blunder or Practical Jokes. (Which no one will ever convince me are anything but dumb and ridiculous.) I mean, really, why is it hysterical when some moron hits himself in the groin? Or falls over trying something that’s obviously going to end with a concussion and broken bones? Or farts. Seriously, just farts. Comedic genius? I think not.

I was often told growing up that I didn’t have a sense of humor. But as I got older, I realized that, no, I just didn’t have their sense of humor. And that didn’t mean I was/am completely devoid of appreciation for all things humorous. I’m just particular about it. Which brings us to the point of this week’s rather short installment.

Humor is subjective.

And I don’t believe that any one type of humor is better than another. Really, I don’t, I swear! (She says with fingers crossed behind her back.) The important thing is that something makes you laugh. And for better or for worse, sarcasm, (along with irony and satire), is it for me.

Why is it the perfect mate for my breed of humor? I’m not really sure. Maybe I was hard-wired that way. Maybe it’s a by-product of growing up on shows like Friends and Seinfeld, (which I’m only slightly embarrassed to admit I still watch daily on re-run). Maybe it’s because it lets me be a snarky ass and get away with it, earning me approval points instead of derision. Or maybe it’s because I can’t resist pointing out when someone does something painfully obvious and stupid.

But most probably, it’s because, in my eyes, sarcasm requires the most intelligence to pull off successfully. And I find intelligence on anyone sexy. To me, it doesn’t seem like it would require much straining of the brain to conjure up jokes revolving around disgusting bodily functions, or to create ridiculous scenarios the audience can see coming a mile away. And don’t even get me started on the number of beyond-retarded things people post on Youtube–a phenomena I have yet to be overly amused by, but that will entertain my husband for hours upon days upon weeks. Half the time, when he shows me a montage of some idiot doing things even idiots should know better than to try, he’s met with the dead-pan stare and raised eyebrow that says, why? Why would you waste my time with that? I just don’t get it. Sorry. But billions of people do, apparently. Hence the long-standing success of America’s Funniest Home Videos, a show whose sole purpose is to crown the royalty of morons with $10,000 for their stupidity. Just saying.

As a writer, I have a fine sense of appreciation for the brilliant usage of words. Which, in the humor department, usually stands hand in hand with sarcasm. I like it because it’s subtle. It doesn’t stand in the room with a neon sign flashing over it’s head screaming, “laugh now!” It’s simply a statement of the obvious. A twisted and bitter version perhaps, but still. It’s put out there and just is. You either find it funny, or you don’t. The validity of the statement isn’t void if no one finds it funny. It makes the person who said it seem like a pretentious d-bag, but the observation still stands. Case in point, I’m sure those of you that adore videos of people doing stupid things would agree that I now sound like a judgmental jerk.

But fear not, the beauty of humor is that it can often be combined, appealing to several comedic preferences at once.

Below is one of the few videos that I’ve found (ok, had force-fed to me because I rarely ever hang out on Youtube) that combines both idiocy and sarcasm, and does it well. Copyright belongs to the brilliant minds of Break Originals and I make no claims to it. I just thoroughly enjoy it and am not ashamed to say I still laugh every time I watch it. Making it the perfect way to close a post about humor. Enjoy!

Warning: Contains heavy sarcasm, people being injured, and country music. And I’m pretty sure a few exercise balls were harmed in the making of this video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqQZZnlJbic